Sea Lions and Kangaroos and Koala Bears, oh my!

Greetings, my friends!

Rumors of this blog's demise have been greatly exaggerated....

I've been traveling to some more remote parts of Australia so haven't had access to the internet or cell phone services. I've also been lazy. Hence the lack of a recent update. Ok, anyways, I've been rather busy over the past 10 days. Scoped out Melbourne for a few days (eh), cruised the Great Ocean Road (woohoo), explored the bustling metropolis of Adelaide (neat), and made friends with lots of critters on Kangaroo Island (yippee).

Let's start with Melbourne. Perhaps I wasn't in the right spots or didn't see the right things, but I didn't really get the attraction of Melbourne. It was nice enough, but nothing really jumped out at me. If I had to draw a comparison, I would say that Sydney is Pittsburgh and Melbourne is Cleveland. So basically, Sydney is decidedly cooler. First couple days were spent at the Exford Hotel which is a shitty hostel located above a raucous bar that bans you from wearing flip flops. Needless to say, I wasn't a big fan. The set up was dumb and didn't allow much in the way of guest interaction so I was more than happy to move on from there. The hostel I stayed in for the next couple nights was located in a little beach town called St. Kilda's. It's about 4 miles outside of Melbourne so I decided to walk because I like walking. I don't, however, particularly care for walking in sweltering heat with 30 pounds of gear strapped to my back. Lesson learned. The reward of my journey was a rather nice hostel that was clean and organized and had a nice relaxed vibe with lots of friendly young peoples all over the place. I dug it immediately. As I was making dinner the first night I befriended a couple of crazy Scottish rubgy players. I only understood about every fifth word they said, but that was more than enough to let me know that they were hilarious and that we would get along just fine. The 3 of us headed to a local pub and had a grand old time dancing around like idiots. Not sure if you knew this, but Scottish rubgy players drink a lot...so needless to say I was struggling the next morning. Nothing a dip in the ocean couldn't remedy though. Unfortunately the beach at St. Kilda is kind of a dump. Oh well, they can't all be winners. I laid on the beach, read a stupid book that I think was aimed towards middle aged women but the only decent one available at the hostel's book exchange, and made it an early night as I had a 7am wake up call the next morning. A couple of images of Melbourne to whet your whistle (fyi - these are out of order but the process of rearranging them has caused severe frustration so just take what you get and like it):

View of Melbourne skyline from the Yarra River Walk.  Ok I guess.



The Royal Exhibition Building.  I discovered this by accident on a late evening stroll.  It was surrounded by some nice botanical gardens and statues of little kids peeing into a fountain.  Those are always fun.



Maggie, surprisingly enough your family's makes a pretty decent bottle of vino.  The floral undertones were to die for! 

Exford Hotel.  Don't stay here if you're in Melbourne.



Another giant face at the entrance of a carnival area in St. Kilda that was also called Luna Park.  I guess there aren't a lot of options when it comes to naming amusement parks since Kennywood is already taken. 

As the sun rose on Sunday morning, I was met at the hostel door by two fun loving Aussie blokes who would prove to be incredible tour guides for the 3 days on the 600 mile journey along the Great Ocean Road. Leith was a pretty boy from Adelaide who had some kind of form of OCD which proved to be an excellent source of entertainment. Sean was a super laidback surfer with a wealth of knowledge and passion in regards to the land, wildlife and people of Australia. They were an odd couple, which was perfect. Our tour group was rather small with only 7 people, but that also proved to be a winning combination. Rachel, a 23 year old nurse from Wales who was in Australia for 2 months on a work exchange; Stu, a dashing 18 year old kid from England who on his gap year adventure; Sandra, a talkative 28 year old German girl who was in month 9 of her 12 month working/traveling trip; Bern, a funny 20-something guy from Bavaria who I'm pretty sure filmed every single thing we did on the trip; Youre, a 22 year old Dutch kid who wore a Yankees cap and a smile the whole journey; and Roland, a 30 year old Swiss fellow with long hair, a Slayer t-shirt and some rockin B.O. An eclectic group to be sure. We were like a little family by the end. Highly enjoyable trip with highly enjoyable people. Some highlights of our trek:

What's so special about this picture, you ask?  Well nothing really, except for the fact that those are the same steps used during the dramatic final scene of "Point Break."  This is at Bell's Beach, home to the Rip Curl Championship (or something like that...basically a bad ass surfing beach, k?)

Great Ocean Road sign, which also has magnetic powers that attracts Asian tourists from far and wide.



The first of many Apostles.  The waves crash into the limestone cliffs.  Erosion slowly works away at the limestone, leaving behind various awesome stuff like this.

Just practicing my skills so I'm set when I get to the Leaning Tower of Pisa and the Eiffel Tower.

Look, ma...I made friends!  The rag tag crew

So this one time a big Scottish ship made it from Scotland to Australia in 3 months, normally a 6 month journey.  To celebrate their good success, they got drunk and forgot to pay attention to the fact that their ship was headed into a cliff.  Needless to say, the celebration was cut short.  There were only two survivors.  A man and a woman who managed to swim to this beach, make it through the night by sipping brandy and possibly having sex with each other.  The next morning the man scaled the cliffs, found some Australian farmers nearby and rescued his lady love.  That's a true story (except maybe the sex part).  Anyways, a lot of stuff along the Great Ocean Road is named after those two crazy kids.  If i had a better memory I would be able to recall their names.  I'll Google it later.

Thumbs up to hidden caves with stalagtites (or stalagmites...I always get those mixed up)

The infamous 12 Apostles (although there are actually only 8 now).  We went here to watch the sunset.  The sun basically peaced out without really saying goodbye, but we were left with some incredibly dramatic backdrops like this one.  It was cold and the wind was whipping across the water and life was good.

Cheesin with the Apostles

I put my life on the line to capture these images for you.  You're welcome.

London Bridge.  Those two masses of rock used to be connected by a natural arch, which collapsed in 1990.  At the time of the collapse, there were two people stranded on the rock to right.  Rumor has it that they were engaged in some extramarital affairs when it collapsed.  So that's basically the worst luck in the history of the world.

This dude was super drunk on eucalyptus.  But oh so cuddly!

That's either a baby joey nursing from his mama or this is kangaroo porn....

That's an emu

Roos are rad

Wally.  He was old and he smelled weird, but he got the job done. 

Welcome to South Australia, bitches!

A couple weird observations about getting speeding tickets in Australia - 1. like everything else around here, they'll put a major dent in your wallet.  2. when you get pulled over, you get out of your car and approach the cop, not the other way around.  I bet that leads to a decent amount of guns being pulled on Australian visitors to the US.

So the trip was a rousing success. We even liked each other well enough to go out for drinks when we got into Adelaide on Tuesday night. There is a big art/music festival going off in Adelaide right now called the Fringe Fest so we were lucky enough to see some pretty decent live music and a comedy show. Adelaide appears to be a little bit more affordable than Melbourne and Sydney, but it's still freakin expensive in this country. A pint of some local ale put me back $7. Shit like this makes New York City seem like a real bargain. But the beer was cold and the company was good so no complaints on my end.

I guess the trip really wore me out because I actually slept in until about 11 am the next morning. Unheard of! Rest of the day was devoted to scoping out the Central Markets, eating some local fruit, laying in a nice sunny park, and being cool. Ate a delicious cereal dinner and got some shut eye as I had to be up at 5:30 the next morning to begin my 2 day tour of Kangaroo Island. Guide for this tour was a guy named Jason who seemed tired and less than enthusiastic to be there. Lame. The tour was filled to the brim with 12 of us stuffed into a little van. Again, it was me and a bunch of Europeans (English, Swedish, Dutch, German and Swiss). America is not well represented out here on the open road. I guess it's because of the lack of proper vacation time. Or something like that. Everyone is blown away by the fact that the standard vacation time is only 10 days. It is strange to be in the minority all the time, but I try to represent the old homefront as best as I can. And if anyone has had any negative opinions of America, they've at least kept their pie holes shut so no fist fights yet. Anyways, we took a ferry from Cape Jervis to Penneshaw and there we were on Kangaroo Island. The human population is only about 4000, but the wildlife population is probably 1000 times that. Saw lots of interesting critters and got to experience some authentic Australian experiences so despite the guide's ho-hum attitude, still managed to have a good time. Still weird to see kangaroos hop across the road like it's no big deal, but life is weird so I guess it makes sense.



This is Celine, an orphan kangaroo that is being raised by the owner of a eucalyptus oil farm on Kangaroo Island.  That sentence is crazy and true.  Anyways, Celine's mother was run over by a car and left for dead on the side of the road.  A short time later, a tourist from Canada drove by and found her.  He then drove to the nearest establishment he could find (the eucalyptus oil farm) and alerted them of the issue.  As luck would have it, the farm owner's wife was a certified animal rehabilitator.  Unfortunately, the mother died, but Celine was saved and the Canuck was given naming rights.  I hate Celine Dion but that's the only bad part about this story.

That's just some sea lions playing on the beach.  They go out to sea to hunt for three days then swim back to shore and rest up for 3 days.  Not a bad gig. 

Our humble abode for the evening. 

So we were given the option of sleeping inside the cabin on some dank and musty mattresses, or setting up a swag and sleeping with the wildlife under the stars.  You bet your ass I chose the latter.  I didn't really know a swag was prior to this experience, but its a great invention that's basically like a rollaway mattress type thing that's encased by a sturdy canvas that you just tuck inside.  It's warm and cozy and I dug it.  Of our group of 12, only 5 girls participated in the swagging.  Those who didn't are idiots.  We saw a couple possums, heard a bunch of weird shit, but made it through the night relativelly unscathed.  Woot woot.

Look up cute in the dictionary and this is what you'll find.

Remarkable Rocks.  Clever name.

Best camoflauge ever

That's probably poisonous

One of the coolest beaches I've ever been to.  The end.

So after making friends with the animals, we made the trek back to Adelaide. It was long and I was super antsy by the end of it. I also felt like I was going to barf, so that might have had something to do with it. Finally made it back at around 9pm at which time I promptly set up my bed and crashed. My current hostel is just ok. They pack 18 chicks in one giant room so that's kinda weird. Some weirdo older German lady in the bed next to mine was lounging around in her bra and underoos last night so I rigged up some sheet curtains for a little privacy from her. I guess that makes me anti-social, but it's really just a survival tactic. Apparently Gilette doesn't do a lot of business in Deutchland.  I'm just saying.

Ok well I think that about wraps it up for now. The weekend will be devote to scoping out some free Fringe Fest events in Adelaide and hanging out at a little beach town a few minutes outside the city called Glenelg. Barossa Wine Tour on Monday, preparation day Tuesday, and then Bali-bound on Wednesday. The party never ends!

Cheers!

P.S. They call ketchup "tomato sauce" here.   It's watery and gross.  Heinz 57, where are you?

The magical land of OZ

Oh hello there!

I'm currently sitting at the State Library of Victoria in the Central Business District of Melbourne right now.  It's a pretty dope little place from what I can tell. My hostel is a little bit sketchy because it's above a bar and the reception area is also the bar area and the main desk person is also a bartender.  But I got a free beer when I checked in and it's in a nice centralized location so no worries.  I'm actually only staying there for one more night and then I'm off to another hostel in a little beachside town called St. Kilda, which is only a few miles outside the city.  The hostel there seems a lot nicer and more laid back.  Stay tuned if that's accurate or not. I'll be there for 2 nights then I'm leaving early Sunday morning for a 3-day guided bus tour of the Great Ocean Road. The tour takes you from Melbourne to Adelaide so I'll get to Adelaide on Tuesday night.  Still have to work out my accomodations there but basically I'll be there Tues and Wed night, then doing a 2 day tour of Kangaroo Island (google that for sure) on Thursday and Friday, followed by a day tour of the Barossa wine region on Monday where I'll sip vino and say stuff like "wow, I love the floral untertones of this one" and "this merlot has great legs!" and hope against hope that no one realizes that I have no idea what I'm actually talking about.  Apparently the Barossa region is one of the best wine-producing areas in the world, so maybe I'll actually learn what a tannin is and then become a total wine snob. 

I guess I got a little bit ahead of myself as I failed to even mention my last few days in Sydney.  Unfortunately, the weather was kind of crappy so I didn't get to go to Manly Beach or the northern suburbs as I had planned.  That's ok though because I did get to see the touristy sights and successfully completed the Coogee to Bondi beach walk on my last day.  So all in all, I'd consider my return trip to be a wonderful success.  For your viewing pleasure:

Super creepy fountain at the Botanical Gardens

The Orient Hotel.  This one is for Marie.  She's a mom now so I can't go into too much detail, but there is a story involving this bar, a bottle of Jack, and the McDonald's across the street.   You'll have to figure out the rest.

The Syney Opera House.  Maybe you've heard of it?

I feel like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles should live here. 

Across the harbor is the entrance to Luna Park, an old time carnival that is protected by an oversized face.

If you have money to burn, you can walk on top of the Harbour Bridge for a few hundred bucks an hour.

Just some proof that me and my tongue were there.

Maybe it's because I'm from the Burgh, but I found thatI was much more intrigued by the Bridge than the Opera House.  Or maybe it's because I don't get along  well with divas.  Haha, just a little opera humor.

You'll find these signs indicating pedestrian walkways all around the city.  I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure Michael Jackson was the model for the design.  Beat it.

Kangaroo Bakpak, my humble abode for the week.  Great place and great people.

Lovely view on the beach walk



And that, my friends, is the dreaded blue bottle a.k.a. Portuguese Man O War.  If you see any of these washed up on the beach, don't go in the water.  Unless you're into lots of pain and shortness of breath.



Surfers lining up for waves on Bondi

I can't figure out why this dumb thing won't let me rotate this picture, so you'll just have to crane your neck to see that this is a package of kangaroo filets at the local super market.  Tasty. 



So that's just a little taste of what I experienced in Sydney.  I took the train from my hostel to the airport yesterday and was lucky enough to sit in front of two ex-cons who were more than open about discussing their time spent in the slammer.  Both had been busted for drug dealing.  I didn't have the courage to turn around and see what they actually looked like, but the one guy was going on and on about how his house got raided and the police officers found 12 kilos of pot but only wrote him up for 10 kilos so they could use 2 kilos for themselves.  The other guy then retorted that the cops punched his mom in the face during the raid on his house.  Mom broke her nose, son spent 6 years in the slammer.  Pretty bad day.  
It rained a ton last night so I didn't get a chance to explore the area as much as I would have liked, but I did get out to the Queen Victoria Markets this morning to walk around and take in some local flavor (as well as some Tasmanian cherries which could quite possibly be the best cherries I've ever tasted).  My camera died so I was only able to get a few pics, but here you go:

Meats

Cheeses

Not sure if you can really tell what's going on here, but that lady is butchering goats and then hanging the remains on that meat hook behind her.  Good times.

Melbourne sells custom made tampons for Steeler fans! 

Whelp, that about wraps it up.  The voyage continues to be a smashing success and I find that I'm living in a constant state of excitement.  Excited about the things I've experienced so far and excited about the adventures that the future holds.  Whoever said that "the journey is the destination" was spot on.  Dig it.

Cheers!

P.S. After searching far and wide, I've finally found something that's cheaper in Australia than the US.  Soft serve cones from McDonald's.  They only set you back 50 cents here.  Ok bye.