Prague Blog - The Big Finish

And we're back!  Turns out I'm a total liar and a few hours actually means a few days.  Hopefully by this point you've had some time to recover from the first installment and haven't keeled over from all the excitement.  Ready for more?  Hold onto your hats...

Crazy Czech hooligans rooting on the Bohemian 1905 squad.  As you will note by the packed stands, this is the hottest ticket in town.

Jorts and a man purse.  Czech dudes are very fashion forward.

As you will note by the tightly clenched fist, Kel was fully prepared to engage in her first football-related brawl.  Everyone was remarkably well behaved though.  Bummer.

The Dancing House a.k.a. Fred and Ginger. 

Baby got back.  Life imitating art. 

My new motto. 

When you go to an Irish pub in Prague it's common practice for an old Welsh guy to draw indecipherable things on your ankle.  Or so we were told.

When you go to the discotheque, it's common practice to dance on tables with weird bald guys and Jersey Shore lookalikes.  Prague is wild!

Sunset over the Charles Bridge.  It's famous for being cool.

Pretty

This is Urine Man, an endearing character who patroled the street below our apartment with a strange bizarro world kind of authority.  He spends most of his days talking gibberish into a megaphone, scribbling secret notes in a tattered journal, taking shots of whiskey and somehow managing not to get arrested.  Here he is giving directions to a businessman.  Shortly after this was taken he probably peed his pants.  

At the John Lennon wall.  He looks like E.T. in this painting.

Travel buddies

This picture is in honor of legendary Pittsburgh vendor, Cotton Candy Man.  He fully embodied the Yinzer Dream.  RIP, good sir.

 

If there's one thing you should remember about Prague, it's Urine Man.  So lest you forget, here he is again showing you how to properly ramble incoherently. 

So there you have it.  Prague is a beautiful city and a fantastic place to do dumb stuff with your buddy.  We laughed, we cried, we ate disgusting local cuisine, and most importantly we drank lots of pilsner.  Two enthusiastic thumbs up.

Stay tuned for more fun-filled adventures involving Dutch shenanigans, Belgian tomfoolery and Scottish hijinks....

The Prague Blog (with a side of Wien) - Part 1

Greetings and Salutations from the upper deck of the Vita Nova, a houseboat hostel situated in one of Amsterdam's infamous canals!  I am issuing this entry as an epic two-part series because I've got lots of pictures and uploading too many at one time makes my computer's brain hurt a lot.  So please bear with me and don't be mad that the time between blogs has recently doubled.  That's what happens when you're joined by a bunch of clowns and all they want to do is have fun with you.  Again, life = hard.

Got to Holland a few days ago and was taken on a grand tour of the countryside for a few days by a native Dutchie. Quite a beautiful place full of flowers, cheese and beer.  Can't go wrong with that combination.  Today marks the reunion of two of the greatest pricing analysts in the history of WESCO, me and Mr. Charles J. Huckestein.  We already walked through the red light district and took in some of the local sights and smells (get it?).  Now that little jerk is taking a nap and I've got nothing better to do than entertain the masses with more tales of revelry.

My timeline is totally off these days because when you have travel buddies time flies by at a feverish pitch.  So let's just say that I was in Vienna about 2 weeks ago.  I feel slightly bad about my experince there because I was mostly using it as a time wasting stopover before I got to Praha and got to travel with a best bud who I will introduce you to in a little bit.  But anyways, Vienna is really a beautiful city and I saw a lot of really cool buildings and monuments and museums and things of that nature.  Unfortunately I don't really know what any of them were so instead of pretending that I do, let's just focus on funny stuff that I observed there:

Austrians sure know how to party

Weiner references everywhere! What a sick and twisted place

Surprisingly smart selection of music at this little shop

As I've mentioned before, I have the same sense of humor as a 13 year old boy so this is hilarious!

Mozart played with the Weiner Philharmoniker.  Wait til the tabloids here about that one!

Creepy wax Mozart.  He's probably thinking about Weiner related things.

All kidding aside, Vienna really is beautiful.  This is evidence of the fact that my trip there involved more than just cheap penis jokes.

But not that much more.  Haha.  No comment.

So after I departed the most phallic city in the whole world, I hopped on a bus to a little place called Prague.  Maybe you've heard of it?  It's a lovely city full of gothic architecture, pilsner beer and parties all the time.  It was in this cozy Czech hamlet that I was reunited with my wee little sidekick, Kelly.  She is an international woman of mystery so I was honored to be able to travel alongside her for the week.  Much like when my family met me in Croatia, I was overjoyed to see the familiar face of someone so dear to my heart.  Throughout the course of the week did our best to set back US/Czech international relations at least several decades.  I think we succeeded remarkably well.  We stayed in a nice little apartment right off of the main square in the old town area so the location was ideal.  Even so, we managed to get lost all the time.  Czech street names are all Nastrikovy this and Zelenekaostriky that.  Anyways we always made it home eventually.  Here's what our adventure looked like: 

The jetsetter cheesin in front of the main town square.  That castle in the background was the inspiration for the Disney logo...or at least that's what we were told by someone with questionable credibility.  So that may be a tremendous lie.



The world famous Astronomical Clock.  People gather here at the top of every hour to see the most anti-climactic display I've ever seen.  Some little skeleton dude pops out and his head moves about an inch in either direction and then some chimes play and then its over.  Most people look bitterly disappointed when its over so that was more entertaining to watch.



Pilsner Urquell everywhere.  Beer is cheaper than water and the people definitely make the most of that.  I dug it.

Bird's eye view of the city.  Bridges automatically make a place cooler. 



What a diva.  On an unrelated note, we noticed that the people of Prague were fascinated with two things: my hair and Kelly's mocassins.  So from what we could gather, they were jealous.



Interior of the church on the grounds of the Presidential Palace.  Very impressive place.



I'm going to get in trouble for posting this, but it's just too good not to share.  A strip joint called Jag's?  Are you kidding me?  She's still waiting to hear back about the audition...

Just taking in some Czech football.  No big deal.

Ok Part 1 is now over.  Stay tuned for the thrilling conclusion.  Should be debuting in a few short hours.  Or maybe longer.  Only the wind knows for sure....

Dobar Donny enjoys sladoled at noon thirty...

Guten Tag aus Osterreich!

I’m currently in Vienna or as the locals call it, Wien.  This difference in spelling and pronunciation is worth noting because everything around town is called “Wiener” this and “Wiener” that.  Seeing as how my sense of humor often mirrors that of a 13 year old boy, this is hilarious.  We’ll get to that in a little bit, because there are many other things that must be discussed first.

So the past 10 days of life have been rather incredible as the majority of those days were devoted to some quality Wright family bonding.  After a few days in Dubrovnik, me and the parentals ventured to a small town called Trogir where we met up with Randy.  We spent a lazy afternoon strolling through the cobbled limestone streets and ended up at a restaurant right on the harbor, enjoying some ice cold Croatian pivos (beers), freshly fried calimari, and warm homemade bread.  It was a rather fantastic beginning to the adventure that ensued.  This is a journey best told through pictures, so here goes:

And here we see why Miss Ellen was never a bartender

After our bike fittings and warm up ride, we ended up at a little restaurant run by this man.  His name is Mario.  Here he is making a traditional Croatian meal called Peka.  To make this deliciousness you pile a bunch of meat and potatoes in a big pot, cover that pot with a lid or "iron bell", pile on some hot coals and sip on some homemade brandy for a few hours while the meat cooks and the potatoes soak up all the glorious juices. 

Lots of excellent seafood in Croatia.  Here's an unlucky idiot who got caught and then ended up in my belly.

Hard to tell exactly whats going on in that pot, but rest assured it was incredibly tasty.  This is what Peka looks like.  I'm not one for superlatives, but somewhere in that sea of meat lies the most delicious potatoes I've ever tasted in my whole life.

Pretty much all of the places we visited were a variation of this.  So I don't remember what this town was called, but in all likelihood it was quaint and beautiful.

Kids these days....

The mountains of Croatia are chocked full of limestone so it's used for many different purposes.  Houses, streets, art, etc.  In one of the little towns we visited we got to go inside a stonemason's school where high school aged kids got to go to study the art of cutting and shaping the limestone into a whole mess of different things.  The barrels are the student's work spaces and the blocks of limestone are unfinished projects.  Very impressive work that's done entirely by hand, without the aid of power tools/equipment.

This proves that we biked somewhere.

On the first full day of the tour, we biked over 30 miles.  A good portion of that was an uphill, quad burning hell ride to a little mountain village where this lovely little couple lived.  Our reward for accomplishing the climb was some homemade vino and olive oil, two of Croatia's most popular products.

Day 2 started with a 10k downhill ride.  Hence the smiles....

Families that play together, stay together.  Dad brought his hair and makeup team to this photo shoot so you'll have to wait to see how dynamite he looks in a helmet.  That's what industry insiders call a teaser.... 



The whole group before the start of the ride on Day 2.  We were told by our guides that we were one of the most fun and easy going groups they've ever had.  Of course they lied a lot about the difficulty of the rides, so not sure if that assessment can be trusted or not.  But I think they were spot on... 



No one knows how that pine tree growing out of the roof of this little church got there.  It continues to thrive despite the lack of soil or water.  The proper way to celebrate this miracle is to pose like an idiot in front of it and pretend like the bike shorts you're wearing don't make you feel like you pooped your pants.

This car is called a Renault and I want one very badly.

Sunrise in the harbor town of Postira.

 

Golden Horn Beach.  This gives you a little taste of how remarkably clear the water is.  Dig it.

We took a boat from the island of Brac to the island of Hvar and were met at the port by this wild man.  He was our shuttle driver for the rest of the week and he wore that exact same outfit every day.  He also played a loop of Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson songs that would inevitably get stuck in your head for the entire day and make you want to hurt someone.   "Let the Circle Be Unbroken"...

View from the Spanish fortress overlooking Hvar Town.  Pretty sweet.

Whenever my mom went missing, we knew exactly where to find her.

Delicious picnic overlooking the Adriatic featuring the finest meats and cheeses in all the land?  Yes, please!

On the last day of biking, we did a killer 6-mile climb.  This is my mom approaching the final stretch.

Bill knows how to rock a helmet. 

The crew looking jubilant after completing the final climb. 

Our last day was spent in the town of Split, home to Diocletian's Palace which was built by the Romans at the turn of the 4th Century.  Inside the palace walls, you'll find this life size replica of the Last Supper. 

Who knew that John bore such a striking resemblence to Brad Pitt?

My dad is not the best when it comes to mastering foreign languages, but he did become quite adept at using one Croatian word: sladoled, which is the word for ice cream.  Follow along as Bill demonstrates how to enjoy this tasty local treat.  Step 1: Give a look that lets people know that nothing comes between you and your sladoled...

..

Step 2: Go in for the kill...

Step 3: Rejoice in the ice creamy goodness!

So moral of the story is that Croatia is an incredibly beautiful country with a rich history and fascinating culture.  It proved to be the perfect place for our family reunion and it will forever hold a special place in my heart.  After months of traveling solo, it was amazing to be able to experience the sights and sounds with some companions and create memories that will inevitably last a lifetime.  Big shout out to mom, dad and brother Randy.  Yinz guys are the best!   Oh and also before I forget, the title of this blog probably isn't funny to anyone except those three but I'll try to explain.  The most common greeting in Croatia is "Dobar Dan" but when my dad said it, it came off sounding decidedly Yinzery so his nickname for the week became Dobar Donny.  Sladoled you've already learned about.  Noon thirty is what our guide Marko called 12:30. So now you're all caught up.  Guess you had to be there...

Today I travel from Wienerville to Praha where the fun continues as I will be reunited with my dear pal Kelly.  We will stroll through the streets, drink beer in the birthplace of pilsner, laugh all the time, and Czech things out (yay for puns!).  Can't wait!

Europe is sweet.  Time is flying.  Life is fun. 

Until we meet again....