Same, same but different

In this life, a person will experience varying levels of coldness.  On one end of the coldness spectrum, you're presented with these types of situations:
- Situation A: You go outside and after about a half hour you realize you probably should have worn a sweater.  A little chill, but nothing too serious if you just sack up and stop a whiny little bitch.
- Situation B: Usually occurs in late October or early November, the day you realize that flip flop season is officially over. The saddest day of the year, but still managable.
- Situation C:  You go to a movie in California, wearing your summer gear.  The powers that be crank up the AC to an ungodly level that forces you to cocoon inside your t-shirt and use a handful of napkins as a faux foot blanket.  Eff you, random movie theater in San Diego.  I'll never be able to watch
"Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" the same way again.  P.S. It's a terrible movie, so this was a blessing in disguise.

On the other end, you have these doozies:
- Situation D:  Taking a cold shower in the middle of the winter due to the fact that the gas bill has not been paid.  Pretty terrible, but ok considering you can put on dry clothes and go to a friend's house to warm up and take advantage of their prompt bill payments.
- Situation E:  Snowy Sunday night Steeler game from the 500 level of Heinz Field at the end of December.  Sure you can't feel your fingers or toes, but you're surrounded by beer swilling yinzers and the Steelers are playing so if you're thinking about being cold, then you're a loser.
- Sitation F: Venturing across the Syracuse University campus during a winter snowstorm with one of your idiot friends in order to get a sandwich from Pita Pit.  Sure the wind is chilling your bones and you're fighting through a couple feet of snow, but there is a delicious hot pita on the other end so it's totally worth it.  Also, you're in college so you can't complain about anything because college is awesome.

I've been through all of these situations and although somewhat uncomfortable, they build character and are usually fun to look back on later.  That was a notion that I had to keep in mind yesterday as the whole "being cold" thing was taken to an entirely different level:
-Situation G: Perched on a steel seat in an unsheltered row boat in the middle of a river in Northern Vietnam in a driving rain during an uncommonly cold day (if my Celcius to Fahrenheit conversion method is correct, it was about 48 degrees).  Perhaps the fact that I've been enjoying tropical climates the past two months made it a bit more severe, but I honestly can't remember the last time I was so cold. 

The fact that I was in the situation at all was a result of a spontaneous, last minute decision.  I had made plans to go on a two-day tour of Halong Bay (a lovely little spot a few hours outside of Hanoi), but was informed about an hour before we were to depart that the trip had been cancelled due to an impending storm moving through. So the front desk guy suggested a tour of the Perfume Pagoda.  He showed me some old school brochure that was written in Vietnamese but had some very nice pictures.  After a minute of mulling it over, I agreed to take the $15 plunge and see what this was all about.  About 10 seconds after that, the bus arrived and I was off on an adventure I knew nothing about.  The tour bus was full of people of all ages and nationalities and I was lucky enough to sit next to a very interesting Syrian man who now lives in Sydney, working part time as a freelance author.  So the hour long ride to our destination went by in an instant.  After we pulled into the parking lot, I made a pit stop at the squatter (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Squat_toilet), haggled with a local lady for a cheap plastic poncho, and followed the group towards the Yen River.  We were battling a pretty heavy downpour at this point, but everyone was still in decent spirits.  We then loaded up on our boat and started our journey to the pagoda.  First 10 minutes were cool, as I looked around and felt like I was in a movie.  Countless boats lined either side of the river.  Hundreds of people in conical hats contrasting against the lush green mountains in the background, creating postcard worthy images of typical Vietnamese life.   Just as I was getting lost in the scene, the rains picked up and the spirits slowly waned.  The bottom of the boat slowly filled with water and my shoes and pants were powerless against the onslaught (fun fact: cold, wet denim is kind of heavy).  Around that time, a nice older Australian fellow asked our trusty tour guide Tony (a funny little Vietnamese guy whose birth name was definitely not Tony) what would happen if we were to experience any kind of emergency out on the water.  Tony shot a puzzled look, put his hands up and said "Swim?"   Haha so that was comforting.

The final 50  minutes of the boat ride were a physical and mental strain, as I tried to enjoy the scene surrounding me while constantly squirming around trying to maintain feeling in my fingers and toes.  I only kind of succeeded.  Anyways, we did eventually make it to our docking spot which was right in front of a little food stand that had a massive goat carcass hanging from the roof.  Good advertising.  As we walked to the entrance of the pagoda, we passed countless other food stands with countless animal carcasses represented.  Boar heads, cow legs, whole baby deer, squirrels, and a certain roasted animal that I couldnt quite identify.  I asked Tony and he responded by making fake animal ears with his fingers and simply saying "meow."  He then laughed a lot.  Sick bastard.  After we made it through the culinary maze, we hiked up a little hill and went inside a few of the temples.  If you want to learn about the Perfume Pagoda experience, here's a thorough summary from my peeps at Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfume_Pagoda

As weird and twisted as this sound, I think I actually enjoyed the boat ride back and forth more than the actual Pagoda.  Sure it was freezing cold and I kind of wanted to die, but it was an experience that I will never forget.  I had no idea what I was getting into when the day started and I still dont really know what the hell was going on, but it was an adventure to be sure.  One of those strange days that I'm sure will be remembered with a smile (and a hot cup of coffee because the mere mention of it will probably send a shiver).

Anyways, that was just one of the adventures I've had here in Hanoi.  Unfortunately it's been cold and rainy the whole time I've been here, but I've still tried to get out and get a feel for things.  My life in pictures: 

Livin in the lap of luxury.  This room came complete with a nice unbunked bed, my own bathroom, a TV with American channels (never thought I'd miss horrible MTV dating shows, but I found myself transfixed by a few one rainy afternoon), free wifi, and a pretty nice buffet breakfast every morning. All this for the low,  low price of $20/night.    I'm the king of the world!

Pho bo a.k.a. Vietnamese beef noodle soup a.k.a. my latest obsession.  I've had it at least once a day since I've been here.  It's the national dish of Vietnam and it's delicious and it generally costs about $1.50 a bowl.  If you live in the Burgh and you want to test this out, head to Tram's Kitchen in Bloomfield.  No frills kinda place, but the food is excellent and quite authentic. 

0.000000000000000000001% of Vietnam's motorbike population.  Crossing the street is a total adventure here.  The motorbikes dont stop for you, they just kind of weave around you.  My strategy has been to walk with a purpose and pretend like I'm not scared shitless.  Haven't been run over yet, so I'll consider it a success.

The Huc Bridge on Hoan Kiem Lake in Hanoi's historical center.  My hotel is a few blocks away.  Its a nice little piece of serenity amidst the chaotic streets of Hanoi.

Art is in the eye of the beholder.  To me this statue by the lake says something like, "This globe is not to scale...that bird is probably taking a crap...I bet the owner of those hands has a hell of a time finding gloves that fit." 

Our chariot awaits.  The boat to the Perfume Pagoda.

Looks like the lady selling those cheap plastic ponchos made a killing.  Visiting pagodas in the rain is fun!

I found a set of stairs off to the side of the main action and decided to explore.  I was met at the top by this lovely little structure.  If you venture a little bit farther back, there is a narrow cave that houses a temple.  I walked in and there were a bunch of people praying and paying their respects.  I felt bad for intruding, but it was a pretty cool thing to witness.

Exploring is fun.

This lady is pretty pumped about things. 

I don't know why, but this kid really wanted me to take his picture.  So here's a random kid.  Enjoy.

Sorry for how gross this picture is, but it gives you a small taste of some of the things that I saw at the Perfume Pagoda markets.  Just be happy I didn't post any roasted cat shots.

Front end boat driver.  The two ladies directing our vessel were like a well oiled machine.  They've got to have the nicest delts in all of Nam.

Despite the miserable conditions, the scenery was still ridiculously beautiful. 



So that's what I've been up to.  A few random observations about Vietnam before I sign off:

- Most people here (men and women) have really long thumb nails.  It weirds me out slightly.

- Vietnamese food is excellent.  And ridiculously cheap.  A nice filling meal and 2 beers generally costs about $4.  I dig it.

- The Vietnamese are quite stoic.  Perhaps I've been spoiled by my homeboys and girls back in Bali, but there doesn't seem to be a lot of laughter around here.  Maybe the stupid rain is just bumming everyone out.

- Went to the Ho Chi Minh Mausoleum today: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ho_Chi_Minh_Mausoleum.  Very interesting/strange experience.  You wait in line for about a half hour before being ushered into the mausoleum in a single file line.  There is no talking, no picture taking and no hands allowed in pockets.  You walk up some stairs and then enter a room and Boom! there's Uncle Ho laid out in a big glass box.  The Vietnamese people look on with great reverance and some even gasp at the sight.  He looked pretty well preserved for a guy who's been dead for 40 years.  This, I learned, was due to the fact that his body is sent to Russia for a few months every year for maintainence.  Anyways, it was a crazy thing to look at for 30 seconds.

Ok I think I might be getting carpal tunnel so I'm going to have to peace out.  Tomorrow will be a full day tour of Halong Bay.  Get back around 8pm and then have to catch an overnight train at 11pm that will deliver me to the town of Hue at 10am on Saturday.  So I'm pretty confident that an entertaining story will emerge from that experience.  Stay tuned for details.

Keep on rockin in the free world....